Nick Drake- (Lyrics)

Nick Drake
Things Behind the Sun

Please beware of them that stare
They'll only smile to see you while
Your time away
And once you've seen what they have been
To win the earth just won't seem worth
Your night or your day
Who'll hear what I say.
Look around you find the ground
Is not so far from where you are
But not too wise
For down below they never grow
They're always tired and charms are hired
From out of their eyes
Never surprise.

Take your time and you'll be fine
And say a prayer for people there
Who live on the floor
And if you see what's meant to be
Don't name the day or try to say
It happened before.

Don't be shy you learn to fly
And see the sun when day is done
If only you see
Just what you are beneath a star
That came to stay one rainy day
In autumn for free
Yes, be what you'll be.
Please beware of them that stare
They'll only smile to see you while
Your time away
And once you've seen what they have been
To win the earth just won't seem worth
Your night or your day
Who'll hear what I say.

Open up the broken cup
Let goodly sin and sunshine in
Yes that's today.
And open wide the hymns you hide
You find reknown while people frown
At things that you say
But say what you'll say
About the farmers and the fun
And the things behind the sun
And the people round your head
Who say everything's been said
And the movement in your brain
Sends you out into the rain. 

(Novel) You Can't Get There From Here- Gayle Forman

You Can't Get There From Here: A YEAR ON THE FRINGES OF A SHRINKING WORLD
GAYLE FORMAN

This travel narrative is full all the things I love most about travel narratives: The search for one's self among strangers in foreign places, amusing stories of never ending difficulties from point A to B to Z, and well presented research of historical or important facts about such places, albeit in an entertaining or practical form.  Forman of course managed to please all these desires of mine and raised the bar.  The places she travelled to were obscure or uncommon to say the least but most importantly she skipped the tourist attractions and hunted down the heart of the locals- or rather, the hearts of the weirdest of the locals!  As an outcast in her early years, Forman sought out the stories of outcasts around the world and found echos of repeated themes.  Even in the furthest corners of the world, globalization was bringing everyone, everywhere on the same page--for better or worse it seemed.  These quotes I picked out do not even come close to summing up Forman's conclusions from her year abroad but spoke to me as I was traveling with her.  

"Cambodia, indeed the world, is full of children as bright as diamonds whose sheen is dulled by the poverty and drudgery of daily life (104)." 


"The antidote to cultural discombobulation is never retreat; it is immersion (116)." 


"If I had learned anything this year ti was that contradictions are complementary, that a truth and its opposite exist in harmony.  It's how the shrinking world was destroying cultures just as it was creating new ones (320)." 


"Life, it turns out, is as big as you're willing to make it (323)." 


This passage I found interesting and I am back and forth on whether I agree or disagree with her myself though her argument does raise some important facts I felt should be shared.

"I have to admit that I am a fence-sitter when it comes to this larger issue. I have read Noreena Hertz's The Silent Takeover, the bible of the antiglobalists, and I agree with her thesis that multinational corporations have come to exert too much power over governments, and even possibly that 'the pendulum of capitalism might have swung just a bit too far; that our love affair with free markets may have obscured some harsher truths; that too many are losing out.' I have met with disenfranchised anarcho/enviro activists who share a profound belief that big business will pillage the earth and its peoples if there is a profit to be made. I have seen firsthand how our Western culture is becoming terminally consumerist as people attempt to buy their way into happiness only to dig themselves deeper into debt- the average American family carries nearly $9,000 worth of credit-card debt--and spiritual emptiness.  I don't want that ethos exported. I don't want to see countries wind up like Thailand, where I had the impression that the nation had been swallowed by the West and regurgitated to the specifications of package tourists, an endless strip of monoculture: hotels, Internet cafes, clothing stores. I have also seen evidence of globalization's missteps-countries plunged into poverty while trying to conform to IMF and World Bank austerity measures.  ....At the same time the disparity between rich and poor in Latin America (and almost everywhere else) has grown larger than ever before. Not exactly ringing endorsements for globalization.  

     "Yet I do believe that globalization is like democracy; the best system in theory, even if it's exceedingly tricky to put into good practice."                --(124-5)

(Novel) The Alchemist- Paulo Coelho

The Alchemist
Paulo Coelho

This novel is a quick read, but left me itching for a never-ending-story sort of book.  Coelho writes about life and most importantly, living life, with such inspiring and motivating words I couldn't help but doggy ear every other page.  I usually pick out a quote or two or maybe even a paragraph I want to remember later but Coelho is that author one must read and re read, and never forget.  

         "It was the pure Language of the World. It required no explanation, just as the universe needs none as it travels through endless time. What the boy felt at that moment was that he was in the presence of the only woman in his life, and that, with no need for words, she recognized the same thing.  He was more certain of it than of anything in the worlds.  He had been told by his parents and grandparents that he must fall in love and really know a person before becoming committed.  But maybe people who felt that way had never learned the universal language. Because, when you know that language, it's easy to understand that someone in the world awaits you, whether it's in the middle of the desert or in some great city.  And when two such people encounter each other, and their eyes meet, the past and the future become unimportant.  There is only that moment, and the incredible certainty that everything under the sun has been written by one hand only.  It is the hand that evokes love, and creates a twin soul for every person in the world.  Without such love, one's dreams would have no meaning (93)."  

"One is loved because one is loved. No reason is needed for loving (122)." 

"People are afraid to pursue their most important dreams, because they feel that they don't deserve them, or that they'll be unable to achieve them.  We, their hearts, become fearful just thinking of loved ones who go away forever, or of monuments that could have been good but weren't, or of treasures that might have been found but were forever hidden in the sands. Because, when these things happen, we suffer terribly. .... The fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity (130)."  

"To realize one's destiny is a person's only obligation." 

Notes on unpacking...

Yes... six months after moving into this apartment, 7 months after graduating from college, I have finally retrieved all of my boxes from storage.  As I rip the plastic and worn out cardboard, memories, feelings, and a full array of emotions flood out of each and every box.  I can literally feel the stress blow into my face while opening a box of school supplies and text books.  Thats when I open a bottle of wine.  The stress hit me so hard it was completely and one hundred percent necessary to clean out a newly unpacked cup from Prothro (my college dining hall, where I stole many cups and dishes for my personal collection).  With half a bottle of wine in me, and all 15 boxes opened so I had at least a sneak peak into its contents, I began the process of unpacking and reorganizing.  Living in a two bedroom apartment is a shock to me of course so I jump a bit when I catch myself making wild reactions out loud to the outrageous contents of these packages!  I giggled out loud like a seven year kid while untangling yards of Christmas lights which decorated my apartment my senior year.  These lights were a staple in almost every memory I have of my time spent in that room!! 

That was college. Here is "post college"

Of course I was super pleased with the first attempt at decoration, until I had a little more wine, and then ended up with the second version.  The second, by the way, left me rolling on the floor laughing out loud. Mind you I live by myself and while I plan to blame this second version on Luis, it was all me......

I replaced a creepy orange and yellow clown painting (complements of my landlord with awesome taste in interior design) with the drawing by Lauren Burke.  This piece was originally displayed in the gallery for Burke's senior show at Sweet Briar College.  The campus library bought the piece and displayed it in one of their study rooms where I, the skilled and experienced thief of large and oversized framed pieces of art, felt the absolute necessity to kidnap for my personal collection.  My personal collection, as a senior in college, meant it sat on the floor underneath my liquor cabinet propped up against two empty helium tanks (a left over special effect from the artist's old video project) and was eventually covered in drips and spills of vodka-cran or whiskey and cream soda or gingerale and... something.  Sitting lonely and unprotected in a far away storage unit in the middle of no where (which I believe is called Sterling, Virginia) for the last 6 months, I finally retrieved this wonderful work of art and it now hangs (yes, I cleaned the alcohol and whatever stains) above my clean (errrr... sometimes) living room couch.  

The more drunk I became, the more I laughed at the notes I left on the outside of my boxes.  My name was clearly displayed on the top of each box and on the sides were fluorescent notes labeled with the contents.  My favorite read, "books, journals, paper, buddha 8 ball, and party favors." I'm not kidding.  Inside I found an 8 ball in the shape of a buddha which answered questions with answers such as, "where is my monkey?" and "rub my belly!"  The very first thing I pulled out was a package of those noise makers you blow at a surprise party or on new years or something that extend and re-curl... clearly the party favors I mentioned. 

My second favorite fluorescent contents note I enjoyed read, "text books, crafts, dinosaurs."  Literally I opened a cardboard box filled with six environmental studies/biology text books, two gallon sized baggies filled with ribbons, buttons, thread and hot glue refills, and at least ten dinosaurs in different forms! This included an adorable beany baby stego from Tbear of course, as well as light up rubber stegos from Sara Buttine, and a plethora of other assorted stegosauruses (which yes, happen to be my favorite dinosaur of choice if you were wondering).  

The only disappointment of this evening was that my one bottle of wine didn't last long enough! I have placed all my books on my new bookshelf (of course the first priority after dinos) and hung up old art pieces and posters.  At least 10 boxes are still filled with old school supplies and computer cords and things I want nothing to do with anymore.  So instead of unpacking and finding places for these nicknacks, I think I'll throw them in a corner of the Wicked Witch of the East's closet and hope it goes to Savanna, Georgia with her evil husband Benji.  Until then, I'm off to the grocery store for one more bottle before bed time :) 

(Novel) The Brooklyn Follies- Paul Auster

I'm reading this novel by Paul Auster.  These are just a few mini passages that I wanted to remember...

"... There were no rules when it came to writing, he said. Take a close look at the lives of poets and novelists, and what you wound up with was unalloyed chaos, an infinite jumble of exceptions. That was because writing was a disease, Tom continued, what you might call an infection or influenza of the spirit, and therefore it could strike anyone at any time.  The young and the old, the strong and the weak, the drunk and the sober, the sane and the insane.  Scan the roster of the giants and semi-giants, and you would discover writers who embraced every sexual proclivity, every political bent, and every human attribute--from the loftiest idealism to the most insidious corruption. They were criminals and lawyers, spies and doctors, soldiers and spinsters, travelers and shut-ins. If no one could be excluded, what prevented an almost sixty-year old ex-life insurance agent from joining their ranks? What law declared that Nathan Glass had not been infected by the disease?"

And lastly, this little note was stamped in my mind all day after I read it:

"She has the story, and when a person is lucky enough to live inside a story, to live inside an imaginary world, the pains of this world disappear. For as long as the story goes on, reality no longer exists." 

Regina Lyrics- Two Birds

This CD has been in my car since before I put it in the shop two months ago. 
I listen to it every day out of habit and only JUST realized how much this song speaks to me
and the unfortunate truth I've always known and refused to accept. 

REGINA SPEKTOR
TWO BIRDS


Two birds on a wire, one tries to fly away
And the other watches him close from that wire
He says he wants to as well
But he is a liar


I'll believe it all
There's nothing I won't understand
I'll believe it all
I won't let go of your hand


Two birds on a wire
One says c'mon and the other says
"I'm tired"
The sky is overcast and I'm sorry
one more or one less, nobody's worried


I'll believe it all
There's nothing I won't understand
I'll believe it all
I won't let go of your hand


Two birds of a feather
Say that they're always gonna stay together
But one's never going to let go of that wire
He says that he will but he's just a liar


Two birds on a wire
One tries to fly away and the other
Watches him close from that wire
He says he wants to as well but he is a lair

The Decemberists- The Crane Wife 3 (lyrics)

The Crane Wife 3

And under the boughs unbowed
all clothed in the snowy shroud
She had no heart so hardened
All under the boughs unbowed

Each feather it fell from skin
'Til thread bare while she grew thin
How were my eyes so blinded?
Each feather it fell from skin

And I will hang my head, hang my head low
And I will hang my head, hang my head low

A grey sky, a bitter sting
A rain cloud, a crane on wing
All out beyond horizon
A grey sky, a bitter sting

And I will hang my head, hang my head low
And I will hang my head, hang my head low